What to Write in a Baby Shower Card
Lines for the card, sorted by how well you know her. The one thing to avoid: a birth story, a warning, or any sentence beginning "just wait until".
Short and safe
Most baby shower cards are read aloud, or at least skimmed by a room. Two warm sentences is the right size.
- 1
So happy for you both. Cannot wait to meet them.
- 2
Congratulations. Wishing you an easy few weeks and a very good sleeper.
- 3
Delighted for you. Enjoy every bit of this.
- 4
Congratulations to you both. What lovely news.
- 5
So excited for you. You are going to be wonderful at this.
- 6
Wishing you all the best for the next few weeks.
- 7
Congratulations. Take all the help anyone offers.
For a close friend
- 8
You are going to be a brilliant mother, and I am going to be an extremely competitive aunt.
- 9
I have known you twenty years and I have never seen you this excited about anything.
- 10
Congratulations. I am on call for the three a.m. shift, and I mean it.
- 11
So happy for you. Ring me whenever, about anything, including nothing.
- 12
You will be fine. And when you are not, I will be there with food.
For a coworker
Warm but not intimate, and no mention of maternity cover or return dates.
- 13
Congratulations. Enjoy the leave and do not think about this place once.
- 14
So pleased for you. We will still be here, being mildly chaotic, whenever you come back.
- 15
Congratulations from everyone in the team. Wishing you all the best.
- 16
Lovely news. Enjoy every minute of it.
For a first baby
- 17
Everything is about to change and most of it in ways nobody can describe to you. Enjoy it.
- 18
Congratulations on becoming parents. It suits you already.
- 19
First one. Wishing you all the luck and a great deal of sleep.
For a second or third
Later babies get noticeably fewer cards. Saying so kindly is a nice thing to do.
- 20
Congratulations. Second babies get half the fuss, so here is some fuss.
- 21
Delighted for you all. Ada is going to be an excellent big sister and an occasional menace.
- 22
Congratulations to all four of you.
- 23
You know what you are doing this time, which will not help at all, and congratulations anyway.
When the pregnancy was hard, or a long time coming
If you know the story, acknowledging it is the most valued thing in the card. If you do not, do not guess.
- 24
I know how long you have waited for this. I am so happy for you both.
- 25
After everything, this. I could not be more pleased.
- 26
Thinking of you, and holding you both in mind until they arrive safely.
- 27
Congratulations. I know it has not been simple, and that makes today better, not smaller.
For an adoption or a surrogacy
- 28
Congratulations. You have been becoming parents for a long time and now it is official.
- 29
So happy for all of you. What a lucky child.
- 30
Congratulations on your son. Welcome to the family, both of you.
For the non-birthing parent
Almost every card is addressed to one person. A line to the other one is noticed.
- 31
Congratulations to you too. You have done more of the invisible work than anyone will say.
- 32
And congratulations to you. Look after her and eat something.
- 33
Two new parents, not one. Congratulations to both of you.
With a gift, on a tag
- 34
Something small for the small one.
- 35
For the 3 a.m. shift. Good luck.
- 36
For you, not the baby. You will need it.
- 37
Not a babygro. You are welcome.
What new parents say they wanted to read
Baby cards are read in a heap, days later, usually by an exhausted person.
- 38
A sentence addressed to her rather than to the baby.
- 39
A specific offer with a date on it.
- 40
An acknowledgement that this is hard as well as lovely.
- 41
Something to the other parent, by name.
- 42
Nothing that requires a reply.
Cards that arrive after the birth rather than before
Different job from a shower card: she has now done the thing.
- 43
Congratulations. You did an enormous thing and I hope somebody has said so.
- 44
She is beautiful and you are allowed to be wrecked.
- 45
Congratulations to all three of you.
- 46
Welcome to the world, small person. Your mother is extraordinary.
- 47
No visit, no expectations, no reply needed. Just: well done.
If the baby is in special care
Write carefully. Do not congratulate as though everything is finished, and do not treat it as a tragedy.
- 48
Thinking of all three of you every day. I am here whenever you want anything at all.
- 49
Congratulations, and I am sorry it has not been the start you wanted.
- 50
No need to update me. I will keep sending these and you can read them whenever.
- 51
You are doing the hardest possible version of this and doing it well.
For a rainbow baby, or after a previous loss
- 52
I have thought about you both a lot on the way to this. I am so glad.
- 53
Congratulations. I know exactly how much this took.
- 54
Holding all of you in mind, then and now.
When to send, and what with
- 55
Before the birth: a shower card, addressed to the pregnancy.
- 56
First fortnight: a card, no visit, no expectation of a reply.
- 57
Week three onwards: a card with food. This is the most useful thing anyone sends.
- 58
If you are far away: a supermarket delivery beats flowers every time.
For a father, or a second parent, on their own card
Almost every card goes to the mother. A card addressed to the other parent is rare and lands well.
- 59
Congratulations, Dad. You are going to be very good at this.
- 60
Congratulations to you as well. I know how much of this year has been you.
- 61
Congratulations on your daughter. Enjoy the leave, all of it.
- 62
Two new parents. This one is yours.
If you cannot make the shower
Very common, and the card does more work than usual.
- 63
So sorry to miss it. I will come and see you properly when the fuss has died down.
- 64
Cannot be there, thinking of you, and the gift is on its way.
- 65
I will be the one who visits in week four when everyone else has stopped. Save me a cup of tea.
Questions people actually ask
What do you write in a baby shower card?
Two warm sentences: congratulations, and one thing you are looking forward to or offering. Add a specific offer of help if you are close enough to keep it.
What do you write if you do not know the parents well?
"Congratulations. Wishing you all the best for the next few weeks." That is a complete card and it is what most of the room will write.
Should I write to both parents?
Yes, and address the second one by name. Nearly every card is written to one person, and the other one notices.
Is it appropriate to mention a difficult pregnancy?
Only if you already know the story from them. Acknowledging it is the most valued thing you can write; guessing at it is the worst.
What do you write in a card after the baby has arrived?
Address the mother first, congratulate the effort rather than only the baby, and add one offer with a date on it. Say no reply is needed.
What do you write if the baby is in special care?
Do not congratulate as though it is over and do not treat it as a loss. Say you are thinking of all of them, offer something concrete, and make clear no update is owed to you.
Should you send a separate card to the father?
It is rare and it is noticed. Nearly every card is addressed to the mother, so a card that names the other parent on its own stands out for the right reason.
What do you write if you cannot attend the baby shower?
Say you will visit later, and mean it. A card promising a week-four visit is worth more than attending the shower itself.