Baby Shower and New Baby Thank You Notes
Written by someone who has not slept. Keep them to two lines, write five at a time, and do not apologise for how long they took.
The two-line version
This is a complete and gracious note. Nobody has ever wanted more from a new parent.
- 1
Thank you for the blanket — it has not left the pram since it arrived.
- 2
Thank you for the sleepsuits. We are getting through four a day, so the timing was perfect.
- 3
Thank you for the book. We have already read it more times than either of us expected.
- 4
Thank you for the vouchers. They are going towards the pram, which is the boring and useful answer.
For people who brought food or helped
These deserve the better note. They did the harder thing.
- 5
Thank you for the lasagne. You have no idea. We ate it standing up and it was the best meal of the month.
- 6
Thank you for coming and doing the washing up instead of holding the baby. That was the right call and we noticed.
- 7
Thank you for taking Ada for the afternoon. We both slept.
- 8
Thank you for the shopping. We had not left the house in five days.
For a shower gift
- 9
Thank you for the gift and for coming — it was a lovely afternoon.
- 10
Thank you for the hamper. Half of it was for me rather than the baby, which was very well judged.
- 11
Thank you for your generous gift and for making the day so special.
When it is very late
Six months is normal. Nine is common. Send it anyway and do not open with an apology.
- 12
Thank you for the gift, which is now well used and much loved.
- 13
This is late and I have decided not to apologise for it. Thank you — it was perfect.
- 14
Thank you for the blanket. Eight months on, it is the one she will not sleep without.
Making it survivable
- 15
Photograph each gift with the card as it arrives. You will not remember otherwise.
- 16
Five at a time, not fifty.
- 17
A photo of the baby using the thing is worth more than any sentence you could write.
- 18
A group message is fine for the shower guests collectively; individual notes for anything posted.
Who to thank, and who genuinely does not expect it
- 19
Anyone who posted something: yes, and they will be wondering whether it arrived.
- 20
Anyone who brought food or did a job: yes, and give them the better note.
- 21
Shower guests collectively: a group message is fine if the host did the gifts as a group.
- 22
People who visited empty-handed and did the washing up: thank them out loud instead.
- 23
Anyone who tells you not to bother: believe them.
Using a photograph instead of a note
The most efficient thank you available to a new parent, and the most welcome.
- 24
A photograph of the baby in the outfit, with two words, beats any card.
- 25
A printed photo card sent to everyone at once is a completely legitimate solution.
- 26
For grandparents and older relatives, print it. They will put it on the fridge.
If you never send them
- 27
Nobody sensible is counting. The people who matter are asking how you are, not where their card is.
- 28
An honest group message six months later closes it perfectly well.
- 29
If one person is genuinely offended, that is a fact about them.
Wording for the awkward ones
- 30
For a gift you have returned: thank them for the choice, and say nothing else.
- 31
For a duplicate: thank them normally. They never need to know.
- 32
For a gift that arrived very late: "Thank you — it arrived exactly when we had run out of everything, which was perfect timing."
- 33
For something enormous you have no room for: thank them for the thought and the generosity, and leave it there.
Thanking the people who did not give a gift
Frequently the people who helped most.
- 34
Thank you for coming round and doing the washing up instead of holding her.
- 35
Thank you for the school runs. You did six weeks of them and never mentioned it.
- 36
Thank you for answering the phone at four in the morning, twice.
- 37
Thank you for not visiting when I asked you not to. That was the kindest thing anyone did.
If a card would be too much
- 38
A text is fine. A photograph with two words is better than a text.
- 39
One group message covering everyone is legitimate and nobody will mind.
- 40
Saying it out loud, next time you see them, is a complete thank you.
A shape you can write half asleep
Two lines, one of which never changes.
- 41
Line one — name the gift: "Thank you for the blanket."
- 42
Line two — where it is now: "It has not left the pram since it arrived."
- 43
That is a complete note. It takes fifteen seconds and it reads as warm because it is specific.
For a gift given before the birth
- 44
Thank you for the sleepsuits — they were waiting for her when we got home, which was lovely.
- 45
Thank you for the blanket. It was on the cot before she existed and it is on her now.
- 46
Thank you for the gift at the shower, and for coming.
For grandparents and older relatives
They want the photograph more than the words.
- 47
Thank you for everything — the gift, the cooking, and the four hours of holding her so I could sleep.
- 48
Thank you. Photograph enclosed, as instructed.
- 49
Thank you for the shawl. It was yours, then Mum’s, and now hers.
When you are ready to stop
- 50
Send what you can and let the rest go. There is no register being kept.
- 51
One message to everyone, months later, closes it entirely: "Thank you all. We are surfacing. Here is a photograph."
Thanking people months later
The most common situation, and the one people feel worst about.
- 52
Thank you for the blanket. Eight months on, it is the one she will not sleep without, which is a better report than I could have given you at the time.
- 53
Thank you — late, and entirely sincere.
- 54
I am writing these at the point where she sleeps through, which tells you everything about the delay.
- 55
Thank you for the gift and for your patience with this card.
If someone asks whether you got it
- 56
Answer straight away and warmly. They are usually worried about the post, not about your manners.
- 57
"It arrived and it is in constant use — the card is on my list and my list is not going well." That closes it entirely.
Splitting the job
- 58
Both parents can write them. There is no convention that it falls to the mother.
- 59
Divide by whose side of the family the gift came from. It halves the job and nobody has to ask who anyone is.
- 60
One person addresses envelopes while the other writes. It is twice as fast.
Questions people actually ask
How long do I have to send baby shower thank you notes?
There is no real deadline and six months is common. Send them whenever you can, without apologising for the timing.
What is the easiest way to write baby thank you notes?
Photograph each gift with its card as it arrives, then write five at a time. A photo of the baby using the gift is worth more than anything you could write.
Is a photo an acceptable baby thank you?
It is better than a card. A picture of the baby using or wearing the gift, with two words attached, is what people actually want.
Do new parents have to send thank you notes at all?
No. Send them for posted gifts if you can, whenever you can, and let the rest go.
What do you say to someone who helped but did not bring a gift?
Thank them specifically for what they did. People who did the washing up, the school runs or the four a.m. phone calls almost never get a card, and they are the ones who helped most.
What is the shortest acceptable baby thank you note?
Two lines: name the gift, and say where it is now. "Thank you for the blanket. It has not left the pram since it arrived." That is complete.
What if someone asks whether their gift arrived?
Reply immediately and warmly. Almost always they are worried the parcel was lost, not chasing a card — say it arrived, say what it is doing, and the matter is closed.
Who should write the baby thank you notes?
Either parent, or both. Splitting them by whose family the gift came from halves the work and removes the problem of not knowing who half the senders are.